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Top 5 Qualities of Emotionally Intelligent Leaders

Emotional intelligence, also known as emotional quotient, is a complex but crucial ability that goes beyond just traditional IQ. Here are five top qualities that can help you develop stronger emotional intelligence.

8/26/20244 min read

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
Mary Oliver

Emotional intelligence, also known as emotional quotient, is a complex but crucial ability that goes beyond just traditional IQ. It refers to the ability to understand, manage, and express one's own emotions, as well as the ability to understand, interpret, influence, and respond to the emotions of others. It involves a set of skills that enable individuals to navigate social interactions, manage interpersonal relationships effectively, and make informed decisions based on emotional awareness.

For a deeper dive into what emotional intelligence entails, let us explore the top five components of what it means to be emotionally intelligent:

Self-awareness: The foundation of emotional intelligence, self-awareness involves recognizing and understanding your own emotions, as well as being aware of how your emotions affect your thoughts, behaviors, and decisions. Such familiarity means self-aware individuals can accurately identify their strengths, triggers, weaknesses, values, motivations, and how they impact your thoughts and behaviors. Self-Awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence. Some key aspects of being self-aware include:

  • Emotional self-awareness: Recognizing your emotions and their nuances.

  • Accurate self-assessment: Knowing your strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations.

  • Self-confidence: Having a positive sense of self-worth and believing in your abilities.

For example: You recognize a surge of frustration during a project meeting and excuse yourself to take a quick break to calm down before rejoining the discussion. Someone with high self-awareness can identify their emotional state and take responsibility for their reactions.

Self-regulation: Once you are aware of your emotions, the next step is to regulate or manage them effectively. Self-regulation involves controlling impulses, managing stress, and adapting to changing circumstances in a constructive manner. It also includes being able to delay gratification and resist temptations in pursuit of long-term goals. This is about managing your emotions effectively. It involves the ability to delay gratification, control impulses, and channel your emotions in a productive way. Someone with strong self-regulation can bounce back from setbacks and stay calm under pressure.

  • Key aspects of self-regulation include:

    • Self-control: Managing disruptive emotions and impulses.

    • Adaptability: Adjusting to changing situations and managing stress.

    • Motivation: Having a drive to achieve your goals and overcome challenges.

For example: You feel slighted by a colleague's criticism but choose to take a deep breath and address the issue calmly and privately later.

Motivation: Emotional intelligence is intricately linked to intrinsic motivation and a drive to achieve personal and professional goals. Motivated individuals set high standards for themselves, are resilient in the face of setbacks, and are committed to continuous improvement. They are able to harness their emotions to fuel their efforts and maintain focus and enthusiasm even when there may appear to be little to feel enthusiastic about. Emotionally intelligent people are driven by internal desires and goals. They find joy in the process of working towards something meaningful and are self-motivated to succeed.

  • Some key aspects of motivation:

    • Achievement drive: Having an ardent desire to achieve and excel.

    • Commitment: Being dedicated to your goals and taking initiative.

    • Optimism: Maintaining a positive outlook and perseverance despite setbacks.

For example: You set challenging but achievable goals for yourself, and setbacks do not discourage you. Instead, you view them as learning opportunities and use them to fuel your determination. Emotionally intelligent people are driven by a sense of purpose and intrinsic goals. They have a strong desire to achieve and are self-motivated to succeed.

Empathy: Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It involves putting yourself in someone else's shoes, seeing things from their perspective, and recognizing their emotions. Empathetic individuals are skilled at listening attentively, noticing nonverbal cues, and responding compassionately to others' needs and concerns.

This is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It involves seeing things from another person's perspective, recognizing their emotions, and responding with compassion.

Key aspects of empathy to keep in mind:

  • Perspective taking: Putting yourself in someone else's shoes and understanding their viewpoint.

  • Understanding emotions: Recognizing the emotions of others in their facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language.

  • Compassionate care: Showing sympathy and concern for others' feelings.

For example: You notice a coworker feeling down and take the time to listen without judgment. You offer support and validate their emotions.

Social skills: Effective interpersonal communication, conflict resolution, and collaboration are essential components of emotional intelligence. Socially skilled individuals are adept at building and maintaining positive relationships, resolving conflicts diplomatically, and working well in teams. They also possess strong leadership qualities and can influence and inspire others to build and maintain healthy relationships.

Here are aspects of strong social skills that make all the difference in navigating human reactions, which aren’t always smooth:

  • Communication: Clearly expressing your thoughts and feelings while actively listening to others.

  • Relationship management: Building and nurturing positive relationships with others.

  • Conflict resolution: Effectively resolving disagreements and finding win-win solutions.

For example: You can clearly articulate your ideas, actively listen to others, and find common ground to build stronger connections with colleagues and clients. It is all about building and maintaining healthy relationships. Emotionally intelligent people are good communicators, active listeners, and adept at navigating social situations.

Recognize that emotional intelligence is not a fixed trait; rather, it can be developed and enhanced over time through self-reflection, practice, and feedback. In fact, if we let it, the cadence of life itself will bring ample opportunities to challenge and hone your emotional intelligence. Remember that cultivating emotional intelligence can lead to numerous benefits, including improved communication and relationships, greater resilience in the face of adversity, enhanced leadership abilities, and overall psychological well-being. In both personal and professional contexts, individuals with high emotional intelligence are better equipped to navigate the complexities of human interaction and achieve success in their endeavors with remarkable resilience.

You can be one too. Remember to:

  • Self-reflect: Take time to reflect on your emotions, behaviors, and how they impact you and others. Keep a journal or meditate to gain deeper self-awareness.

  • Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness exercises can help you become more aware of your emotions in the moment and respond thoughtfully rather than reacting impulsively.

  • Develop empathy: Pay attention to the emotions of those around you and try to see things from their perspective.

  • Improve your communication skills: Learn to express your emotions clearly and actively listen to others.

  • Seek feedback: Ask trusted friends, colleagues, or mentors for honest feedback, and self-reflect on your emotional intelligence.

These are just five aspects to focus on, and there are many resources here available to help you on this journey, so show your commitment to personal growth and self-development by c/l/s and dropping a c to share your insight on emotional intelligence. By focusing on these areas and practicing these skills, you will not only develop your emotional intelligence and reap the many benefits it offers on your journey, but help make life a little lighter, easier to navigate for yourself and for others.